Poised between the Autumn and Winter, Halloween is a time of celebration and superstition. As the nights drawn in and the leaves wither and die, it is an atmospheric time to indulge in the spine-chilling pleasures of ghost stories and enjoy some thoroughly spooky festivities.
The origins of Halloween are often associated with the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain, although there is little evidence that the Gaelic festivals held in the Autumn were ceremonies for the dead. It is more probable, therefore, that perceptions of Halloween as a time when the veil between the living and the dead is lifted and ghosts wander the earth, is linked the Christian festivals of All Saints and All Souls. In fact Hallows is an archaic English word for saint – hence All Hallows Eve, the last night of October.
In the Middle Ages it was a commonly held belief that those who died unabsolved of their sins would be condemned to wait in Purgatory, and that living friends and relatives could release them from this state by praying, collecting alms, attending mass. On All Souls Day torchlit processions were held, bonfires were lit and church bells were rung to comfort lost souls.
By the 14th century the custom of ‘souling’ had developed in England. Poor supplicants would go from house to house on All Hallows Eve asking for soul cakes. Small cakes or loaves were exchanged in exchange for prayers for dead relatives (the origins of trick or treating).
During the Protestant Reformation these customs and observances were driven underground. It was not long before the festival had taken on more occult and demonic associations, which were disapproved of by the Church of England.
The widespread adoption of Halloween customs in the USA did not really take place until the 20th century, and at first trick or treating was seen as ritualised begging. It did not become a widely accepted until after the 1950s. Since then, aided by Hollywood and US television, Halloween has become an increasingly popular ritual in many countries worldwide.
‘Tis now the very witching time of night,
When churchyards yawn and hell itself breathes out
Contagion to this world.
William Shakespeare, Macbeth
The legend of the jack o' lantern originated in Ireland. Stingy Jack, who double crossed the devil and was condemned, on his death, to become an eternal wanderer, was given a burning coal by the devil for light. Stingy Jack carried the coal in a carved out turnip and has since been wandering the world.
In Ireland and Scotland, people began to make their own versions of Jack’s lanterns by carving scary faces into turnips or potatoes and placing them into windows or near doors to frighten away Stingy Jack and other wandering evil spirits. In England, large beets are used. Immigrants from these countries brought this tradition with them when they came to the United States. They soon found that pumpkins, a fruit native to America, make perfect jack o’lanterns.
•Bear in mind that many people have become increasingly antisocial as a result of the pandemic, and may be genuinely alarmed by strangers knocking on their door. Explain this to your children and curb over-enthusiastic knocking and commotion
•Only allow children to go trick or treating in your own neighbourhood. Make absolutely sure that they don’t stray beyond agreed boundaries and wander into streets where they are knocking on strangers’ doors.
•Remind the children not to be too greedy – if they are offered a basket of sweets tell them to help themselves to just one, unless invited to take more.
•“Trick or treat?” should be used as an ice-breaking formula, not a real threat. If a treat is not forthcoming and the householder is not welcoming, then you should advise your children to beat a hasty retreat. Pranks are not recommended.
•Trick or treating is fine for small kids (though very young children should be accompanied by an older sibling). But as children become gangling teenagers their antics might be viewed with unfriendliness and suspicion. Discourage older teens from terrorising (however innocently) the neighbourhood.
•If you don’t like the idea of being besieged by a succession of over-excited children you’re probably well-advised to turn out the lights and go out for the evening.
•If you don’t mind giving out treats, but would prefer not to have visitors, leave some sweets or chocolate on your front door step and let trick or treaters help themselves.
•If you’re at home on Halloween night, you can advertise your readiness to accept callers by switching on a porch light, leaving out a Jack o' Lantern, or even illuminating your garden.
•Make sure that hazards are removed from pathways, and keep noisy dogs behind closed doors.
•If you’re providing treats, you can buy special Halloween confectionery, complete with ghoulish wrapping). These will be universally popular with children, who might turn their noses up at your home-baked goodies.
Are you about to start a new job? Or maybe you were hired during the pandemic and only now are able to contemplate actually going to the office and meeting your new colleagues in the flesh.
Whatever your situation, the first week at work can be a daunting prospect. You will have to attend closely to work requirements, new technology and unfamiliar protocols. You will have to make the acquaintance of new colleagues, put names to faces (and remember them) and project a positive and amiable demeanour. On a more subtle level you will need to read the situation, understand the office culture and calibrate your behaviour accordingly.
We have compiled some advice to help new recruits navigate their first days at work.
The First Week at Work Survival Guide:
1.) Ask for Help when You Need It
Your first few days in an office are not a test to see how you perform under pressure. So if you feel confused by office procedures, puzzled by the photocopiers, and completely outwitted by the computer system, don’t just sit tight, trying to tough it out. You will be judged not by the mistakes you make, but how quickly you learn from them.
Single out a kind, helpful person – very possibly the colleague who was given the task of welcoming you – and indicate that you need some help. It’s best to do this diplomatically, perhaps saying ‘When you’ve got a moment, I wonder if you could help? I’m a bit stuck…’, rather than marching up to their desk and saying ‘I don’t know how to unjam the photocopier…’
2.) Respect Territorial Boundaries
Don’t assume that, just because some action doesn’t bother you, it won’t annoy others – leaving caps off pens, leaving untidy piles of papers on a desk, not putting things back in drawers, etc. Ask politely before you borrow anything and make sure you return it, and leave your desk neat and tidy at the end of the day. Your aim in these first few days should be to project a discreet and inoffensive persona. As you become more comfortable and more familiar with the office culture you will be able to reveal more about your individuality and character.
3.) Take Your Turn
Office life can throw all sorts of incompatible people together in close proximity and it is important that everyone finds ways of rubbing along together and getting the job done. Demonstrate from the outset that you are a team player – make tea and coffee for your colleagues, take your turn to do the washing up in the staff kitchen, offer to pick up sandwiches for other people if you are going out at lunchtime.
4.) When in Rome…
You will need to very observant in the first few days, so that you can fully understand the office culture. If the general tone of the office is quiet and reserved, then boisterously friendly overtures on the part of the newcomer may be out of place and unwelcome. If the general impression is that staff in the office keep themselves very much to themselves, then this has to be respected, even if it doesn’t seem the right way to work.
Similarly, if the office buzzes with chatter and banter, then an unyieldingly frigid response to every overture of friendship isn’t appropriate. Most workplaces have a detectable culture, covering such diverse questions as informal socialising after-hours and willingly stepping in to alleviate a colleague’s workload. The newcomer ignores this at his or her peril.
5.) Treat Gossip with Circumspection
There will be those who wish to initiate the new recruit into the office gossip, and they should be treated with extreme caution. Over-eagerness to find out about the gossip and even join in might mean that you fall foul of important people; gossip is particularly dangerous for the uninitiated. Remain polite but make your excuses and leave.
6.) Be cautious about criticism
A newcomer may be bursting to communicate how much better he or she handled matters at a previous workplace. There are few things worse than the daily frustration of knowing that it’s possible to work faster and more efficiently but not being allowed to do so. But your new colleagues may find a newcomer’s criticisms presumptuous so tact is needed here: bide your time and settle in before finding the right person to talk to, and if you do have a conversation, use the subtle power of tentative and positive suggestion, rather than bludgeoning them with hard facts.
As the world returns to something like normality, many of us are ready for a new start and a new challenge. We have spent successive lockdowns agonising over our careers and are ready to launch ourselves onto the job market. And with vacancies at an all-time high, there's no shortage of opportunities.
But how do you make your CV stand out from the crowd, ensuring that you at least have a chance to shine at the job interview? We’ve come up with some essential advice for all job-seekers to ensure that you don’t fall at the first hurdle.
Compiling Your CV
Of course you will want to show yourself off in the best light, but be careful about exaggerating and making claims about your career that you will not be able to substantiate when questioned.
There are myriad ways in which you can choose to present your CV. Your choice should reflect the stage which you have reached in your career, and which aspects of it you want to bring to the foreground. If your career progression has been steady and uncontroversial, you will probably choose to present your working life chronologically. If, on the other hand, you have had many jobs and there are unexplained gaps and absences, it might be more sensible to go for a skills-based CV, which reflects on your various attributes and specialisms, and how you acquired them.
In general, CVs start with your education, and your job history (if you are taking the chronological approach) is listed with your most recent employer first. Don’t use long paragraphs – it’s hard work for employers and will put them off. It is really helpful to spell out exactly what skills you acquired and utilised in previous jobs. This will act as a clear signpost to employers, who may well be feeling overwhelmed by wading through swathes of prose.
Bullet points will break up the text and make it easy to read. You do not have to present your entire life story – edit the information, keep it short, concise and relevant.
Listing hobbies such as ‘socialising with friends and going to the gym’ will sell you short. They don’t demonstrate what value you’re bringing to the company. Only include hobbies that will have a positive spin, e.g. running marathons (striving to push yourself to the limits), playing in the local football team (team player), amateur theatricals (creative people person etc).
Don’t be afraid to include details of your social media accounts (e.g. Twitter, LinkedIn, blogs) but only do this if you think it is a positive reflection of you. It’s becoming more common for employers to search for potential employees online, so by including this information you are making it easier for them to find you.
Finally, review your CV every time you apply for a new job. Advertisements will highlight the key skills that are required, and you must present your experience in a way that will demonstrate that you possess these skills. This might mean tweaking and editing your CV to reflect specific requirements.
Presenting Your CV
These documents should be clearly laid out, legible and professional looking. Avoid typefaces that mimic handwriting, or jaunty, joking typefaces like Comic Sans. Opt instead for something classic and elegant – a safe default is Times Roman. Don’t use obscure software to create your CV; Microsoft Word is universally used in the business world, or you can save your CV as a pdf, another universal medium.
Ensure that your CV has a legible header that clearly displays your name, address, phone number and email. No employer is going to waste time scrabbling around trying to find ways in which to contact you.
You will need to provide the details of referees at the end of your CV (two are sufficient), or you can add the phrase ‘References on request’. If you are citing referees by name, it is a basic courtesy to secure their agreement in principle to your request.
Finally, remember the top three things that will turn off employers are bad grammar, spelling mistakes and poor formatting, so check your CV meticulously. Take advantage of simple online templates or even use your own creativity – just remember to have a fresh pair of eyes look at your CV before you send it
Your Covering Letter
It is increasingly unlikely that you will send a covering letter in the post, since most job applications are now digital. Nevertheless, it is recommended that you treat this communication as essentially a letter in digital form.
If the job advertisement calls for a CV and covering letter, then you should probably format the letter in the conventional way and send it as a Word attachment, with a very brief email accompanying your application, just stating the position that you are seeking. If this is not specified, then it is quite acceptable to treat your email as the covering letter.
This vital document is the first thing any potential employer will read, and it will determine whether they actually look at your CV or not.
To ensure that your letter acts as an excellent, and enticing, introduction to your application, follow these rules:
Whether you're taking part in the month-long challenge for Macmillan or supporting a friend or family member who's on the wagon, we've shared some tips for surviving Sober October with a clear head and with your relationships intact.
Most people, at some point in their life, refrain from alcohol. On occasions, refusal of alcohol is for perfectly clear medical reasons (booze may clash with prescription drugs, or an operation is impending, or the person is pregnant). At other times, it is more clearly a case of self-imposed abstinence: this can range from a few weeks ‘clean-living’ to a committed campaign to kick the drink habit altogether.
Now we have an even better reason to temporarily abandon the demon drink. Sober October is being promoted by Macmillan Cancer Support, which is inviting social drinkers to go alcohol-free for all, or part, of the month of October, in order to raise money for people with cancer. This scheme not only benefits the charity, but it can also be argued that it is beneficial for the participants, who will feel more energetic and clear-headed as a result of their abstinence and will not have to contend with hangovers or drink-induced social embarrassment.
If you are a friend of a temporary teetotaller, you must respect their decision. As a host, you may be confronted with a refusal of drink from your guest. Never question why this is happening; never cajole, or plead, or tease. You may be disappointed that they’re not joining in the party fun, but you must never let this show – meet their refusal with good grace, and offer a tempting range of alcohol-free drinks.
If you are the teetotaller (however temporary), you must also mind your manners. Refuse a drink politely; give an explanation if you think that helps. Never act the martyr, miserably cradling your mineral water as the party takes off around you. And if you’re foregoing drink for charity, resist all temptation to virtue signal – remaining glumly sober while gleefully occupying the moral high ground will not win you many friends.
Never proselytise your fellow guests about the benefits of an alcohol-free existence. If you are sober, intoxicated company can be baffling; conversations meander, arguments break out for no reason, non-jokes are met with general hilarity. If you are unable to cope with this alcohol-induced anarchy, don’t go to the party. If you can endure these antics without a censorious air, remember that you will be worth your weight in gold – the one sober guest at the end of the evening who is able to sort out the increasingly unruly guests, and even drive them safely home.
Containing almost 3,000 families and 150,000 names, the new Debrett's database features some fascinating individuals. From actors to hip hop artists via 'pub landlords', here are ten members of the peerage and baronetcy that might be familiar:
1.) Kit Harington, actor and star of Game of Thrones, is the son of Sir David Harington, 15th baronet Harington. His full name is Christopher Catesby Harington, and he had a son with his wife, Scottish actress Rose Leslie, this year.
2.) Helena Bonham-Carter, actor, is the great-granddaughter on her father's side of Herbert Asquith, First Earl of Oxford and Asquith, who was prime minister from 1908–1916. She can be found under the entry for her grandmother, Baroness Asquith of Yarnbury, daughter of the 1st Earl, who was created a life peer in her own right.
3.) Cara Delevingne, supermodel, is part of a branch of the Sheffield baronetcy, created in 1755, whose motto comiter sed fortiter means 'Courteously but bravely'.
4.) Rosie Huntington Whiteley, supermodel, is the great-great-granddaughter of the 1st Huntington-Whiteley baronet, Sir Herbert James Huntington-Whiteley.
5.) Al Murray, the comedian famous for his 'pub landlord' character, is related to the Duke of Atholl.
6.) James Nesbitt, actor, was married to the daughter of Sir Stephen Forbes Adam, fourth baronet.
7.) Michael McIntyre, comedian, is married to Kitty née Ward, who is a great-granddaughter of the 9th baronet Malcolm, sister of Sophie Ward and daughter of Simon Ward.
8.) Stacy Ann Duhamel, née Ferguson (Fergie), singer and songwriter formerly of the Black-Eyed Peas, is a descendant of the 2nd Earl of Arran.
9.) Jamie Lee Curtis, actor, is married to Christopher Guest, 5th Baron Haden-Guest, himself a well-known screenwriter and director.
10.) Claudia Schiffer, supermodel, is married to film producer Matthew Vaughn, who is related to the Earl of Perth.
Photo by Mark Large/ANL/Shutterstock (4472656a)
Last week's Cabinet reshuffle featured some surprising promotions, some less surprising demotions, and a notably lengthy ‘discussion’ between the prime minister and his (now former) foreign secretary.
Anyone who has been on the receiving end of unwanted notice will identify with the inevitable frictions involved. Redundancies and dismissals can lead to feelings of rejection, anger and anxiety, and need to be handled with care.
We’ve shared some tips from our forthcoming Guide to Business Etiquette on how to make the process as pain-free as possible:
The moment many couples have been anticipating has arrived and the Covid-related wedding restrictions have finally been lifted. Guest numbers are unlimited, mask-wearing no longer obligatory, self-service buffets are an option once again, and music and dancing are allowed.
But reverting to the pre-Covid situation is going to be a gradual process, and over the course of the pandemic many couples have re-thought their wedding plans, perhaps opting for smaller wedding day celebrations, to be followed further down the line by celebratory parties. Wedding venues are at a premium and therefore some flexibility and willingness to discard more conventional expectations is required.
It is also imperative, especially if your wedding is fast approaching, to remember that the pandemic is by no means over, and to exercise a certain degree of caution. Amongst your guests you will almost certainly have to accommodate the full gamut of Covid perspectives, from the very relaxed back-to-normals, who have discarded their masks and their inhibitions, to the super cautious, who are extremely nervous about social interactions.
How do you accommodate this diversity? Firstly, you must acknowledge it. If you are proceeding with your wedding, you are probably very invested in the notion that normal life has returned. But you must be aware that not all your guests feel that way and, since weddings are usually multi-generational affairs, there will almost certainly be a number of elderly guests, who may feel more vulnerable. You will therefore have to be punctilious about ventilation, ensure that seating is not too cramped so that a reasonable amount of social distance is maintained, and provide hand sanitizer and face masks.
It might be wise to add a note about Covid to the wedding information ‘pack’ you send out with your invitations (along with information about transport, accommodation and so on). You could simply add a reassuring note along these lines:
We are taking all reasonable precautions against Covid, and can assure our guests that adequate ventilation and social distancing options will be in place. Face masks are not obligatory, but we will have masks available for any guests who require them.
If you have been bruised by the whole pandemic experience, and the resulting uncertainty about your wedding has made you re-think your plans, it is quite acceptable to do so, even if you have already sent out invitations or save-the-date cards. The situation is exceptional, and people will understand reluctance to proceed with earlier plans. The most important priority is to keep your potential guests fully informed, so send out a printed card, or letter, as follows:
Wedding of John Montgomery and Helen Mayfield, 25 September 2021
We regret to announce that, because of the ongoing consequences of the Covid pandemic, we have decided to downscale our planned wedding. We very much look forward to celebrating our marriage with you at a later date (to be announced). OR We hope we will be able to celebrate our marriage with you in the near future.
The British Empire was built on deadpan humour, the clenched jaw, the occasional polite smile. Adversity was something to be confronted with stoicism and sang-froid – there are numerous apocryphal tales of the phlegmatic reaction of Britons to disaster.
The imperturbable refusal to react histrionically to tragedy and disaster came into its own at times of national crisis – the terrible losses of the Great War, the devastation of the Blitz. But the sun has set on the British Empire, and it would seem that in doing so it has melted the famously stereotypical 'stiff upper lip'.
Nowadays, it is thought to be psychologically more healthy to admit to vulnerability and freely acknowledge emotion. As we watch Team GB’s achievements at the Olympic Games in Tokyo, we have witnessed bucketloads of raw emotion, from tears of frustration and despair, to ecstatic joy, frenzied excitement and triumphal celebrations. Athletes have spoken freely about their personal traumas and difficulties and the emotional impact of competing in the world arena.
But would it be a mistake to assume the pendulum has swung completely in the opposite direction? The stiff upper lip is deeply ingrained in the British psyche, and despite the media’s endless focus on sharing feelings and emotions, the underlying sang-froid of the British still runs deep. This national characteristic is a great asset when things go wrong: when athletes see so-nearly-attained medals slipping from their grasp, when trains are postponed or cancelled, when the British summer once again falls short, and the sun disappears behind a blanket of relentless grey cloud.
And when the cards are really down (pandemic, natural disaster, terrorist attack), the British are still capable of putting their newly-discovered feelings to one side and demonstrating an implacable tendency to keep calm and carry on.
